It's taken me a few days to calm myself to write this post. I may even delete it before I press publish. Or drink more wine. There are so many issues running round in my head....
Monday was one hell of a day. ...
Monday was one hell of a day. ...
I accompanied a close friend to a Macquarie Street medical appointment and she received good news...Yee Ha!
We then popped into Tiffany & Co and 'played' with jewelery I had only ever seen before online! I bought a much wanted necklace.... so exciting...and my friend was very patient! On a high!
We then hailed a taxi to visit another friend in St Vincent's Hospital to see her between two radiation treatments that day in preparation for a Bone Marrow transplant on Thursday....our flowers were banned from oncology and we realised that bright, bubbly 'hope' attitudes didn't quite cut it anymore...
...so we cried with her listening to her to talk about death but we couldn't hold her... and.watched her go off to her next treatment. So F*$#ing hard.
Shopped some more....but with no spirit...
So many beautiful Christmas displays....
...and exhausted got back to the car and my friend realised she'd lost her car keys....
it was a .....very .......long ........day....
There are lives we live apart from Blog land. My husband often refers to my 'other life' with great amusement. Well it is an escape..
.
.
My friend's struggle with Leukemia has been going on for over a year. It's been complicated by the unrelated need for her large bowel to be removed, pleurisy and blood clots. She's a mum of two little girls 9 and 5.
My Dad battled bowel cancer last year and won by a bloody bee's foreskin....My most dear friend had a Mastectomy last Christmas and I was so busy with Mum and Dad, was never there for her...my inability to excuse myself still preventing me from contacting her....
My husband suffers from severe, incapacitating Ménière's Disease, has spent over three years, four days a week bed-bound,
Mum's been in and out of hospital with debilitating, but undiagnosed seizures and I have significant cardiac, thyroid and weight problems, and am pre-diabetic.
Another in my close circle of friends is unexpectedly pregnant and violently ill (hospitalised twice so far; she's 8 weeks) and another separating from her husband after 12 years of marriage....
Tomorrow I'm going to the funeral of a beautiful young male friend who took his own life because he couldn't see his children this Christmas in an ugly custody dispute....
My Dad battled bowel cancer last year and won by a bloody bee's foreskin....My most dear friend had a Mastectomy last Christmas and I was so busy with Mum and Dad, was never there for her...my inability to excuse myself still preventing me from contacting her....
My husband suffers from severe, incapacitating Ménière's Disease, has spent over three years, four days a week bed-bound,
Mum's been in and out of hospital with debilitating, but undiagnosed seizures and I have significant cardiac, thyroid and weight problems, and am pre-diabetic.
Another in my close circle of friends is unexpectedly pregnant and violently ill (hospitalised twice so far; she's 8 weeks) and another separating from her husband after 12 years of marriage....
Tomorrow I'm going to the funeral of a beautiful young male friend who took his own life because he couldn't see his children this Christmas in an ugly custody dispute....
I've had enough of 2011...
Oh.... and just to let you know.... this is NOT want I want to blog about...
Just filling you in a 'moment' I'm having.
I like interiors, design, renovating, shopping and family.
I like dwelling on positives and laughing about negatives...
I guess I'm just giving you more of me and my life than usual!
x KL
Thank you for stopping by my blog. You are very welcome and encouraged to comment; I love receiving feedback! It helps me get to know you too!
Hugs, hugs and more hugs to you KL.
ReplyDeleteYou know that I am not good with words but I just want to tell you that we are here for you <3
B
So many people whom you love and care about, in such great straits. It must feel completely overwhelming and I understand that. Life is such a lottery of luck, and there seem to be stretches of good and happy things, then stretches of bad. (Having said that, I think your scales must be well and truly due for a balance up right about now.) The saddest of these is your friend who took his own life...
ReplyDeleteAnd blogging, I think, is not just about the superficial, but is a connection between like minded people who would otherwise never meet. So there can be good days and bad days, just as in life. Good stories and bad stories - it all hopefully balances out. I am hoping that 2012 will be a much better year for you, your family and your friends. Hang in there! It can turn on a sixpence! Virginia xx
Hello Kerrie-Lee:
ReplyDeleteWe are so very sad to read about all the problems that you are experiencing at the moment. It is true that your blog is usually a haven of positive and joyful things, but you are entitled and, we believe that it is so necessary, to say exactly how you feel at times when everything seems unbearable.
We can say from our own direct experience that Leukaemia is a very treatable disease and we have countless examples amongst friends and acquaintances of the positive outcomes of treatment which are advancing all the time.
We too shall be pleased to see the turn of the year and trust that 2012 will bring happiness and good health to you and to your friends and family. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Take care.
Thank you for sharing. Don't let your crappy year get you down, although some days can feel like they are sent to break you? Call your friend, you will be glad you did. My dad has Ménière's too, sucky disease! All the best with your health troubles. Let's hope 2012 picks right up for you and your family. x Jode
ReplyDeleteKL - this may sound weird, but thank you for sharing your true reality. I often come away from reading blogs thinking that I'm the only one with 'real life' issues, because everyone's lives 'appear' so perfect. Often, this makes me more sad in my own space. Having said that, I am always very careful in my own blogging/forum use to be positive, because that is what is 'expected'. But, I appreciate that you have gone out on a limb with your honest sharing.
ReplyDeleteWhilst my daily challenges are nothing on the list you have just made, they are still my challenges, and knowing that others are experiencing sadness kind of makes me feel less alone.
I wish you strength, rest and love and send you compassion.
M
xxo
PS: I hope that all came out the way it sounded in my head! So glad you got your hands on a little piece of Tiffany!
A very open and honest post, KL. I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties you've faced over the year. My hopes are with you that 2012 will be brighter. The blogs are a wonderful escape from the harsher realities of life, but your post has reminded me of the blessing in my life. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI think 2011 has been a tough year for many... it seems like you know most of them!! I totally get that your blog is your happy place. I do that with my blog too but sometimes real life creeps in...and it is hard not to feel sad. Take it easy. Fingers crossed that 2012 will be better for you, your family and dear friends.xx
ReplyDeleteI can't write a comment any better than the ones already posted here, so I echo their sentiments and wish you, your family and friends a much brighter 2012 :)
ReplyDeleteHi KL, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles of late, as to some degree I can relate to your year of kaos. Lets hope 2012 brings Happiness to all. I'm relatively new to blogland and I've nominated you for a Liebster Award to brighten and cheer your day, Thanks Mellissa from downrubylane.blogspot.com.
ReplyDeleteKerrie, doesn't life just suck sometimes. I truly think getting these things off your chest, in whatever forum you choose, is healthy and worthwhile. We all have difficulties which life throws at us and those around us...you really are copping a lot at once. Well done on a positive, lovely to read blog, which I look forward to reading all the time.xx
ReplyDeleteI've just discovered your blog. Congratulations for being brave enough to tell it like it is. Life can be total shit. We all try to be positive but sometimes you just have to let it out. Hope things improve.
ReplyDeleteTDM xx
ps don't forget to enjoy your new indulgence!
Just a little something to brighten your day!
ReplyDeleteI have awarded you the Liebster Award, a little recognition for blogs with under 200 followers. I love popping over to your blog. You have very funny stories to tell, not only about building but life, which I can often relate too! And you share the other parts of your life, that make us all stop and say thanks.
Have a great weekend. x Jode
Thank you from the bottom of my heart to every single person for their extremely supportive and kind comments on a blog post that I wish I hadn't written. I am very humbled by the compassion shown from you all. I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to succumb to the weight of all of this but you have made me reassess and realise that reacting like that was OK. Again, sincere thanks for your unexpected and much appreciated empathy.
ReplyDeletex KL